I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
