well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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