I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I skipped work to stalk him.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
