she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
