Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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