OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like iHOP with fire
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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