is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
