Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize