Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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