He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
