In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
