I cannot find my penis.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
