nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
