How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
