I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Randomize
