shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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