Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
