so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Is Oprah even human
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.