Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
found the other keg... it's in the tree
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Randomize
