i just wanna soil my oats bro
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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