READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
