paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
