pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
