I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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