okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Randomize
