I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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