WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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