She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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