I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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