Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
as a side note pls kill me
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize