Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
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