Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
