I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize