too bad you live with your parents still
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
