wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize