I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Randomize
