You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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