then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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