just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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