That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
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