You made me cry and you don't even care
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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