This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Dignity is for republicans.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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