dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
