did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
