I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
