I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
