nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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