More tranny stories later!
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Naked. naked and bneed help.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
