I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
