i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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